A recent text message allegedly sent to a girl from her boyfriend that went viral has The Doctors discussing the signs of an unhealthy relationship.
In the text that was posted on Reddit, the guy – identified as “Hot Stud Muffin” – laid down a series of ridiculous rules for his girlfriend who had just gone away to college.
“NO BOYS. NO DRINKING. NO BOYS. [NO] DRINKING. NO BOYS. NO DRINKING. Please be smart alright. I know you will dang it but please be smart,” the message begins, and continues, "This is really hard for me because I've always been a tremendously good person and have never gone to a party. When I text you, you are to answer. The party is not and will not ever be more important than me. You better know what you are doing."
Hot Stud Muffin adds, "Please don't do anything to ruin us. I know you won't but a reminder never hurt. Around 9:30 text me when you'll be home. Have fun. I love you bunches.” He closes with, “I don't know why I allow this but whatever go. NO BOYS. NO DRINKING. And I love you. And you're calling me tonight and I'm getting every detail."
Psychotherapist Stacy Kaiser says this text is a glaring red flag. “What I see is an inappropriate relationship. My daughter just went off to college, if she got that text, I would literally be like, ‘Run! You are not allowed to see him anymore. Delete him from your phone,'” she says, explaining this relationship appears very unhealthy.
According to The National Domestic Violence Hotline, these are behaviors and actions of domestic abusers to look out for in your teenager’s relationships and your own:
- Telling you that you can never do anything right
- Showing jealousy of your friends and time spent away
- Keeping you or discouraging you from seeing friends or family members
- Insulting, demeaning or shaming you with put-downs
- Controlling every penny spent in the household
- Taking your money or refusing to give you money for expenses
- Looking at you or acting in ways that scare you
- Controlling who you see, where you go, or what you do
- Preventing you from making your own decisions
- Telling you you’re a bad parent/threatening to harm/take away children
- Preventing you from working or attending school
- Destroying your property or threatening to hurt or kill your pets
- Intimidating you with guns, knives or other weapons
- Pressuring you to have sex when you don’t want to
- Pressuring you to use drugs or alcohol