Hello,

MY STYLE? Lagenlook of Europe- I design fun clothing in real European and Irish linen NOT sold in USA! A friend has them made and she sells them- it was my intent to create some USA art-and seamstresses jobs. I do not earn any income - this is my way of helping our Country- one person at a time. I need income- but I am not able to.

I am spiritual, and love much- yet very isolated as my condition gets worse.

Educated- major career before 30 and after 35

I have never been selfish- or a druggie or bar person- loved outdoors and nature- hiking to camping raw style - anything outside was better than house work.Divorced an abusive drunk when my son was 3- never a payment did he make or care a bit for his only child. I raised my son in my in home daycare for a total of 10 children- over 10 years with them - then went to real estate- found that was full of crooks-so was recruited due to my marketing branding savvy to develop 600 acres to an upscale community. I did- until one day as work - my head buzzed- i was alone as always- and..

In 2001- I had a stoke- and no one was around at the time- I found my way to my Mother's home , who had just come out of the hospital from back nerve problems.

I spent 6 months at her home- and slept and could not speak or write. it took me 6 years to train my eyes to read- and I went to a doctor 6 months later.-after being at her home- she was also "out of it"

People who have these stokes do not have any logic. Since the age of 12- 14 I was diagnosed with spurring of muscles and tendon's- now called fibromyalgia. Also , I was the first surgery patient of Stein- Leventhal Syndrome or  PCOS- by wedging the ovaries.

After a tumor- the size of a baseball was removed( at 36) , and my female organs- I realised my whole life I have been in a form of menopause.

I have gone to the hospital the last TIA- or small stoke- and due to my age- I was left in a room while employees watched the MAURY show- shift change. My son saw it happening and I started to do something never before- faint- or melt to the floor.

I cannot find anyone to help me prevent my condition as it deteriorates. I am 50 now- and have insurance as well as medicare- I am disabled - career gone- etc...

Is there hope for my condition I wonder- or am I a time bomb?

I have one son( 24-owns his home-age 22), who was born by miracle- is in school and working so much -I was told I could never have a child.

I have been able to create clothing designs and actually compete with fashions in Europe- however I cannot fill an order or cook any longer-

I do have a person in another state to help me- it is just a creative outlet. I gave up trying to think about work- as when I am tired- the left side of my face goes numb and I go blank again.

I have chronic pain from the nerves being damaged over and over- and tests to confirm the nerves are damaged-

I no longer drive my Miata- I came to this site to see if anyone out there is the same- is there hope?

thank you for your time

Susan