Really bad day today. Her stomach tube is infected, she was "out of it" really bad,talking oout of her head and crying over the tiniest thing. She resembles herself B.C. (befire cancer), momentarily. Sunny, my sister, has actually become someone else.

The transport to do a proceedure never happened, but they moved her to a non=private room. She is so unhappy to do this, as her privcy is diminished. She did a little PT today and the therapists made a note of telling me that this was the 1st time they felt her not even wanting to try. That may be because she is heavuly drugged again.

I am torn between 2 things, a stiif upper lip in front of people and complete emotional collapse in private. I am okay as long as I don't think about the bad docs she has seen .... and angry when I do. Someone tried to teel me thst I needed to forgive those who did wrong by her, And to just forget and move on .... Oh no, taht's NEVER happening.  I am going to stay angry, and I am going to see a lawyer ... we'll never stop, my family and I untill the docs responsible for ignoring her at least know what we know ... that they dropped the ball. There is alot more of a story than I have told here, so readers, you may not understand, but I just won't "move on".

3 1/2 years ago we had an employer do us very wrong, and when it all was done, we sued and settled for alot less than we should have gotten. We actually only wanted enough to cover what we lost due to him, in a minimal way. After the fact, we discovered they had conspired against us and plotted out what they did to us. I AM BEING CAUTIOUS HERE NOT TO REVEAL ANYTHING TOO DEEP. IUt's the stupidest thing we ever did! In light of what was actually done to us, we needed to have gone the distance, and used more than we did to win. All we wanted was to get a small amount of back pay and whatever he owed in unemployment and to tear up the covenant agreementso we could work. So, we ended up not using all we had on him to get a better deal ... no other woman working for him even attempted to get theirs,either, for the 8 workers he dismissed unfairly. Only me and Sunny had the guts ... we won the case and both appeals. ...without a lawyer ... I got online and read and learned and I represented myself. Must have been convincing ...  I won.

But I had the ability to get more. He got off lite and he knew it. Had I been smarter, I'd OWN him ...Don't you KNOW I am going to look at this terrible thing my sister is going thru like this? I need to at the very least, if that is all I can do, get a lawyer to scare the people involved. They deserve to at least think they might get in trouble! What we didn't do to our old employer, was to make him pay well for having messed us up.

Emotionalyy. right now, I am okay. I know God's plan may not be what I'll like or expect. I can accept that. What is troubling me is how other people want me to act. Especially those who tell me I should not be angry. Some of them are people so meek, that they won;t stand up for themselves at all. I should take "pills" to chill me out ..etc. That'll never happen. I think some people are scared to feel anyhing strongly. I am not. I thinnk strong feeling are preferable to being a Stepford Wife and do nothing and let people jerk you around. Someone once said to me that it was unlady-like to represent myself in court, etc. HMMM so you just letn people jerk cyou around? I DON:T THINK SO!  This is what bI was thinking today while I watched my sister struggling today.

Rainbow