Isn’t it amazing how we give up so many important things in our lives when we become mothers, and we ignore even the crucial ones that may define us as women.

I have been forced to take my me time lately and it has taken just that for me to squeeze it in. I have about 2 hours travel time each day to get to the set where we are shooting my show.  Normally I would dread that, but these days it is so useful, grounding, and eye opening.  I have been using that time to think, write, and sometimes even rest in silence to change gears before I walk into my house with 4 anxious children waiting for their many needs to be met.  I’ve never had that time before to shift into the right space before taking on the many different roles that I play.

In the early morning hours, today being 4:30am, I enjoyed the drive into work, no one on the road, darkness, peace, and I was able to think about my own feelings for 30 minutes. That’s hard to come by in my busy life, so I took in every moment to check in.  I thought about all the things that are coming up for me lately, emotionally-speaking, while David has been away working on a new show. I know many women whose husbands travel, and they do just fine.  David and I have never been apart, and the kids have never been away from their father.  I had so much anxiety about David leaving; I was not sure how I would handle it.  I also had a lot of fear about the kids, and I wondered how their little minds would process Papa being gone.  The truth is that I got so caught up in the “movie in my mind” of how difficult it was going to be that I lost focus on how I could be embracing the situation. Sound familiar?

I hate to admit it, and I know MANY women will agree, but it hasn’t been so bad! One less person to take care of, a hell of a lot less laundry, I get to watch all my chick flicks on TV, I’m sleeping in my sweats while taking up the whole bed, and sometimes eating cereal in there which I totally enjoy!   Don’t get me wrong, I’ve missed him terribly, but something about living alone is not so bad, LOL!   On the flip side, I am having my lonely moments, they come and go, but for the most part I have surprised myself and I feel as if I grew up!

My point is that if we spend less time feeling fearful and anticipating the worst, we may surprise ourselves.

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• Brooke
• Burke
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